A Simple Sneeze ([livejournal.com profile] scarvesnhats Day 06)

Oct. 7th, 2005 05:32 pm
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[personal profile] rosie_rues
Title: A Simple Sneeze
Rating: Gen
Disclaimer: Not mine
Wordcount: 860
Prompt: sick
Notes: Sixth-year. Pre-Slash. The first half - the second half will answer today's prompt. There were days when Remus really wished he had stayed in bed.

1 2 3 4 5 6



Remus wasn’t paying much attention to Sirius at breakfast. He was busy trying to shush Peter, who had taken offence at having to get out of bed while it was, “Still dark, Moony. It’s not natural. Human beings are not nocturnal. It’s not healthy to get up in the dark.”

“But then wizardkind invented lumos,” said James glumly. Remus was certain he would have joined in the whining if Lily hadn’t been glaring at Peter.

“I think cavemen invented fire first, Prongs,” he said patiently. “Wormtail, you’re being ridiculous. You got up at exactly the same time last week.”

“But it wasn’t dark, then.”

“Good point.” James applauded.

Sirius was attacking his porridge with military precision, glowering at the letter in front of him. Remus was aware that he really ought to do something about that situation soon but right now McGonagall was glaring at him and Peter was getting louder.

“I don’t see why we shouldn’t get more sleep in winter. There’s nothing wrong with hibernation. It’s not like there’s exams or anything important-”

“Quidditch,” James intoned, draping himself across the table to grab the honey. “Have to thrash Slytherin. Kill them. Wipe them out. Decimate them.”

“But there’s only seven of them,” Remus began.

“A-choo! Ach-ah-ah-choo!”

The sneeze was loud enough to be heard the length of the Great Hall and it came from the Slytherin table.

“Good show!” James called loudly.

Remus elbowed him. “Don’t start anything.”

“Who is it?” Peter asked, bouncing in his chair as another volley of sneezes echoed around the table.

“Regulus Black,” one of the fifth year prefects said.

Sirius still hadn’t moved. He was regarding the depths of his porridge bowl with an intensity Remus found unnerving. Over at the Slytherin table Narcissa Black was leaning towards her cousin, the candlelight gleaming off her wreath of pale hair. Regulus looked flushed and his eyes seemed bright, even from here. Narcissa said something and he tossed his head back in negation, an action so arrogant, so graceful, so Sirius that Remus felt dizzy. Then he sneezed again, ruining the effect.

Severus Snape, sitting on the other side of Narcissa, got up and stalked across to loom over the younger boy.

There were times when Remus blamed all his lackings as a prefect on his inability to loom.

Regulus crossed his arms and shook his head. Remus was intrigued. Regulus Black did not make scenes. At least he hadn’t - not since the time he had been heard making remarks about Sirius behaving like a common Muggle which had ended with his face smeared into the lemon syllabub and James Potter’s fifty-fifth detention.

Snape glared down at him and Regulus shot to his feet. Immediately he swayed and the colour drained from his face. Then he toppled backwards onto the Slytherin table, sending plates and pumpkin juice skidding into his housemates’ laps.

All through the resulting commotion, Sirius continued to eat his porridge, spoonful by steady spoonful. Remus, who always felt queasy this close to the full moon, wondered how he could.

He made the mistake of looking away as Madam Pomfrey floated Regulus out of the Hall. When he looked back, Sirius had commandeered Peter’s bowl and had dropped that day’s letter into it. It was emitting a green, sulphurous steam as he prodded it with his spoon.

“I hadn’t finished,” Peter complained.

James craned over to look. “I wouldn’t try now, mate. It’s melted the tip of the spoon.”

Sirius was humming faintly. Remus, with a certain sense of impending doom, asked, “Padfoot?”

Wingardium leviosa,” Sirius murmured and the steaming bowl rose quietly. Remus watched it soar towards the ceiling and silently begged a teacher, any teacher, to notice.

The clouds were rolling overhead, grey and heavy, and the bowl was almost hidden against them.

He really ought to intervene but Sirius was smiling. He hadn’t smiled properly since the letters started arriving.

“Who’s it for?” Peter asked, tilting the milk jug so he could watch in its reflection.

“Slimy, bullying git.”

Remus was fairly sure that he had just seen a fellow prefect attempt to send a sick housemate to the Hospital Wing. “Sirius…” he tried.

“Can’t let a prefect abuse their power, can we?” Sirius said.

“Lily!” Remus yelped, taking the coward’s way out.

She turned and stared at them. Immediately, her eyes narrowed. “What’s going on?”

“Traitor,” Sirius said and brought his wand down.

The bowl plummeted.

“Don’t kill him!” James snapped.

Sirius twisted his wrist again and the bowl turned upside down. The glowing contents slid from the bowl in a single, viscous glob, straight onto the glistening head of Severus Snape. The bowl bounced off the table as he reared back in surprise and then howled as his hair caught fire.

“Don’t kill him!” Lily shrieked at James. “Was that the best you could do?”

Narcissa Black, whose reflexes Remus couldn’t fault, dashed a jug of pumpkin juice over Snape’s head and then whirled, charging towards the Gryffindor table. Half of Hufflepuff ducked and Sirius went for his wand with a whoop of glee.

Regulus, Remus thought as chaos descended, probably had the best of it.
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